"Advices"

Don’t need to own a pickup truck yourself but

best that you have a friend who do, & you

should know accidents leaving the strip club

tend to involve a bigger tip with the tow.

The word ‘widdershins’ still means something

if you know the right nerd to ask;

and out of all of them, glaucoma sure is

a better kind of coma to have.

A 2-litre of soda-pop chilled down to 10 degrees

will freeze solid just when you open it:

like us humans, when the pressure’s released 

it becomes what it really is – and then makes a mess.

There’re so many lists you don’t want to be on,

from no-fly to alien grocery;

so out of respect I keep my shitlist blank 

using shinkicks immediately.

(sigh) Remember, the money isn’t the work you did —

it’s ship’s scrip for the crashing starship Earth:

there’s an outside to each and every thing, and

mistaking means for ends soon enough’s evil itself.

—Aw shucks now, gone done’n got windy, son, 

y’all take care now and tip well for your Miller-time Bud…